I spent a lot of my life feeling afraid and disempowered. I’ve written a lot about it, and I’ve always focused on the emotional aspect of it along with the trauma trigger that precipitated it. That is the because the primary focus of my healing work with myself and with others is to find the underlying limiting belief and/or pattern that is creating the undesired outcome (whether emotional, mental, spiritual, or physical) and then focus on how to shift the patterns and behaviors so that we may find a way to present ourselves in the world that feels more in alignment with who we truly are. Determining who we really are is often a part of the journey as well.
For me, one of the physical manifestations of disempowerment that I experienced was a serious candida overgrowth. As a result of it, I spent years in a foggy, confused, depressed and anxious haze. Towards the end of it, my system began to reject foods and I was experiencing extreme discomfort in the form of constant bloat, acne, and achiness. As an intuitive, I suspected that the cause of a lot of my physical symptoms stemmed from being raped and the subsequent years of alcohol and drug abuse mixed up with fear and feelings of victimization, but I didn’t fully understand the complexity of what was happening to my body.
The more it lingered, the worse I got. I often refer to those years in my mind as “the dark years.” When I look back on them, it’s like there is a veil of sticky, dark energy hanging over my entire being and I felt trapped and victimized by my circumstances.
I did a lot of self-healing and I also worked with other healers to start pulling back the layers of self-hatred and fear. As I started to gain more clarity, and I began to feel a little stronger in my sense of self, I got to a point of actually believing that I deserved to feel better. This was a huge turning point for me! A part of me had truly believed that it was just my lot in life to be tired, depressed, and disempowered.
I did a lot of research and came across information on candida, and I knew immediately that I was suffering from an overgrowth. I didn’t even hesitate to start the diet, despite the fact that I was going to have to make drastic changes in the way that I was eating and living.
I experienced immediate relief from my symptoms and I thought that I was “cured.” I went back to my regular life, and things moved along smoothly for a while. I was feeling pretty good. My ex-husband and I had separated and I was optimistic about my future. I felt like I had moved into brighter and better days.
I moved back to the States from Costa Rica and I soon stepped into old patterns of behavior that included drinking and disempowered and co-dependent relationships. I was dropping into depression again and I was at a complete loss with respect to how to manage it. I quit drinking; I changed my diet. I tried supplements. Nothing was working. In a moment of desperation, I stumbled upon a Nutritional Response Therapist and I went to him for testing. My system was crashed and my diet included foods I was sensitive to. Underneath it all: candida.
Again I treated it and coincidentally (or not so coincidentally), I began to shift the dynamics of my personal relationships and my life. My candida cleared again.
It wasn’t until I facilitated a remote healing session with Elicia Miller that I understood fully what had happened, though. I was engaged in my healing process throughout my experience with candida, so even though I didn’t catch the direct connection to it, I was doing the right things to eradicate it. I was stepping through my fears and eliminating toxic relationships. I was making strides to leave a profession that felt stifling to me and moving into full-time healing work. I was learning to take care of my emotional needs.
What Spirit shared with us during that session was the emotional/psychological component that allows candida to flourish within our system. I was able to understand why my candida had returned and what work I need to do to keep my system in balance. I still have a few food sensitivities, but I can consume fruits and chocolate and grains and tea. I can indulge in a dessert and not worry that my symptoms will reappear. It’s been completely liberating.
When Elicia expressed interest in hosting a retreat to help others work through the core issues of their candida overgrowth, I knew I wanted to be a part of it. Her tagline is: Your symptoms are a gift. Through all the work I’ve done with clients that are experiencing some sort of physical imbalance or dis-ease, I’ve learned that our symptoms are the doorway to growth. We get the opportunity to know ourselves better, to clear patterns and express ourselves in a new way. If we treat the symptoms but ignore the root cause, the inner expression of imbalance will, without a doubt, find another way to express itself, either through a relapse into the same illness or through another. Ultimately, treating the symptoms but not the core issue is another way of numbing what really just wants to be known.
“After 1.5 years on the strict candida diet and another 1.5 years of deeper healing, I felt healed from candida. I then got into an old relationship pattern with a man and my wounds were triggered. My bloat came back with a vengeance and I got a yeast infection. That’s when I reached out to Janet for an intuitive energy healing to see if my Candida symptoms were emotional and what I needed to do. Janet saw my inner child sitting cross-legged, knocking to let her out, to let all of the repressed anger, sadness and even joy that was still repressed out. I did my inner child work and emotional releasing, and I took care of my emotional needs by ending the relationship. That was three years ago and I haven’t had any candida symptoms, cravings, or emotional eating since. I can eat what I want, I married my soul mate, and I live fully empowered from my heart’s desires. Through Janet’s work I discovered the root cause of Candida and have created a course, programs, and retreats to address healing all aspects of candida to be truly free.” –Elicia Miller