I’ve been going back and forth with a decision that I need to make and every time I feel like I’ve got it made, I find myself hopping back over to the other side of the fence. The decision has to do with one aspect of my career. It’s something that I’ve been doing for a while that I enjoy, but it tends to exhaust me and it can feel a little counterproductive at times.

In part, I have trouble letting go of things. I always have. When I build a relationship with someone or something, I tend to cling to it, fearful that if I release it I will lose a part of me or miss out on something. A lot of my growth and development over the last several years has been with respect to learning the art of letting go. I’ve made some improvements, but it still challenges me, even when I know that releasing the person, place or thing is past due.

As this is happening in my life, I (of course!) have a client that is going through something similar. In fact, I see this with a lot of my clients, many of whom are highly empathic. (My sense is that it is even harder for empaths to let go of things; it can feel almost like something is being torn away from us.) Because of this, some time ago, my team shared with me a very simple technique for discerning when something is in alignment with us or not. I’m going to share a simplified yet still effective version of this here with you:

Get quiet and follow your breathing. Take slow breaths in, allowing your belly to rise and then fall as you exhale. Feel yourself drop into your body. When you feel yourself in your body (versus in your head), you can establish a baseline. So I might say, “I am a girl” or “I love dark chocolate” for my feel-good/true statement, and “I am a boy” or “I love olives” (yuck) for my negative one. Choose a few for yourself and notice how each of those feels in your body. Everyone will sense the answer differently and your baseline may even change according to what’s going on with you.

Next, ask yourself the question that you are pondering and see how it feels to you. You may want to ask it both ways to get a full picture of the situation. If you’re curious about leaving a job for another, you might sense into staying at your current job. Notice how your body responds to this. Do you feel constricted or open? How is your heart, your gut? What’s your posture like? You may want to do a scan to get a comprehensive understanding. Then follow up with feeling yourself in the new job and repeat the same steps as above.

Try not to feel discouraged if it takes a time or two. Some people resonate immediately with this and others benefit from a few tries to get it. Most of us spend a lot of time outside of our bodies and so establishing this type of relationship may be initially challenging (though ultimately rewarding). Know that the body never lies! Our minds will tell us stories, but the body always reveals the truth.

Let me know how it works for you! And yes, I did get my answer: Let it go; it’s time to move on. I shall be doing just that.